Children make me laugh

As Monday rolls in I always wish there was a day between Saturday and Sunday, so I can just honestly say that I my weekend didn’t fly by. Except that’s not the case, this Monday was pretty what I expected. One of my vital morning duties is to patrol the swing set, to make sure kids don’t run through children swinging and hit their heads. Sometimes I’ll just wait to see how far the get, how much they are willing to push their boundary, before ending up crying or on the floor or maybe even both. Most of the time I laugh just seeing them run because small children have the balance of an egg, it is something definitely learned with time, very very very much time. Except what caught my attention this morning was a game a group of kids had devised with a soccer ball. All right here it goes, so one kid would kick up the ball and the rest of the children would wait to catch/get hit/ or kick the ball back. I’m not sure what kind of point system they have develop thus far, promise to report back once I play and win (duh). Perhaps a hit on a head is 2 points for the kicker and 5 points for the person who kicks it back, well just a thought.

Monday’s are also the day where you relish on how your weekend was with your fellow co-workers and as well with some of the more verbally skilled children. This morning 2^nd grade girl asked me why I was wearing different clothes. I’m usually quick on my feet to answer something sarcastically back except this time I was stumped. I didn’t understand her reasoning for the question, with a perplexed face I answered that I had finally showered that morning (no worries I aim to shower on a regular basis). She didn’t respond to my answer, it possibly wasn’t what she was waiting, complete confusion on both parties so I walked away in a cool manner.

Staying in the whole 2^nd grade momentum, they are by far my favorite age group. They still say some things that are odd yet funny simultaneously, however they are at the cusp of turning into moody older children that just want to be cool. Today a teacher disclosed some very interesting notes she had the great fortune of finding, 2^nd grade love notes. I had no clue this was even a thing, what do they know? Well apparently enough to be asking if they wanted some kisses, ‘Boy, do you want to kiss me?’ I truly hope that they’re talking about the chocolates kisses. Possibly when you ask someone to kiss you it translates to, “Oh hey, yeah give me your chocolate candies”, in English from 2^nd grade English.

Hmm what else, I think the children have finally ended testing me to ensure that I’m cool enough. I’m pretty certain I passed the probationary period, since I've been getting hugs left and right, which make me feel very loved. Now I wonder how much longer till the good stuff, fan mail.

Lunch over pain, blood and pretty much anything

Kinder duty never pans out to what you hope it to be, there’s always a kid who runs too fast and falls face first or a kid crying because someone called him/her stupid (without knowing what the word means). Today Boy was explaining to me his sorrows of being clipped down to yellow; all he was trying to do was sound out his phonograms even though it wasn’t his turn.

[In each class there is a chart where clothespins, with the children’s names, are located at different areas detailing how the child behaved that day: pink (5)= star student, blue (4)= good job, green (3)= neutral is good, yellow (2)= warning/watch it, red (1)= parent contact]

Any who… as Boy was explaining in detail as to why he was clipped down, be it that I only understood about 50% of what he was saying, I could see the anguish he was going through. I tried to be as cheerful as possible, reminding him that it was almost lunch and then everything would get better. That if he behaved the rest of the day, his teacher was sure to clip him up. As he whisked away to play with the wind or something, I turned around because I’m technically on patrol, watching out for any wrong doing on the playground. As soon as I turn around Boy had fallen straight down to the sidewalk. Before I was able to get to him ten+ kids had surrounded him, who all simultaneously had the urge to tell me that he had fallen as if I wasn’t able to see it with my own eyes. I get to Boy and of course the floor was too mean to him and he was crying (really cute cry btw). I tried to help him up except that I was unable to; in that case I had to talk through step by step through those painful tears in order to get him upright. This was all the commotion at recess today; after I was able to get him walking I told him that we needed to go to the nurse in order to get his elbow cleaned up from the dirt and blood. Except he didn’t want to go, he thought it would take time away from his lunch. I never thought I’d have to convince a 5 year old that we would have enough time to get a band aide and time to eat. Once arriving to the nurse’s office he exclaimed that this was his WORST day ever, it was as well his ninety-nine second time there. He had fallen earlier and already had a band aide on his shin; he clearly felt that the second band aide would prevent him from fully enjoying his lunch. Worst day ever (for him). As we finally walked hand and hand to the cafeteria he couldn’t believe that today out of all days was the worst day, as well he kept asking if everyone was already at lunch and if he could get extra time, if we could walk faster to the cafeteria (the best one). It was hard to reassure him through his lunch anxiety that he would have plenty of time to eat. We were the first ones in the cafeteria, once he walked inside he didn’t even turn back to say goodbye.

Also a 2^nd grade Boy said he liked my huge glasses, I’m not sure if he was being sarcastic or serious. I need more time in order to dissect the 2^nd grade mentality/humor/weirdness.

Big kid says hello

Greetings, this is my story of a slightly bigger kid (me) taking care of other kids and getting paid for it. I will try to record or a least remember the funny stuff they may say or tell about the stuff they put in their mouths, which they shouldn’t be doing under any circumstance. By far this experience has been a trip; elementary age kids require attention, patience, and patience. They may talk too much, squirm in their seats as if their butts were on fire, or ask questions that make me want to laugh. Overall they’re pretty cool humans, so may my words tickle the butt of your heart.